How to Stop Perfectionism (forever) ● for creative minds
I had the biggest creative breakthrough last night. And almost instantly, I knew exactly how to stop perfection…forever.
This is a big claim, I know. But I stand behind it.
I’ve struggled with perfectionism my whole life. It created friction, overthinking and hesitation to start (because all my ideas became too planned and too much, way too soon).
Perfectionism leads to inaction. It’s like your body and nervous system avoid starting because you know deep down, it’ll look ugly, feel small and take a long time. So we avoid the judgment and pain.
But I solved all that. In an instant.
Here’s how to overcome your perfectionism (hint: don’t).
Table of Contents
What Perfectionism Feels Like…
Before we solve this beast, let’s get to know it a little more first.
There are some big signals that perfectionism has taken over the steering wheel.
It’s something most of us can probably relate to…
Signs + Impact of Perfectionism
Experiencing more frustration than fun
Avoiding your work
Struggling to get start or continue
Negative self talk or low self concept
Not celebrating or appreciating your progress and little wins
Being too hard on yourself, judging to harshly
Feeling impatient
Seeking validation
Toxic productivity
A loss of joy for the creative process
Wanting to control everything
How to Stop Perfectionism Forever ● 3 Steps
Stop Trying to Get Rid of Perfectionism
Is perfectionism really all bad? Because I’m curious about the gems sitting beneath the surface…
I can think of a few:
Attention for detail
A high level of care
A deep belief in yourself, knowing what you’re capable of
A little bit of obsession (is good)
The problem is rogue, unchecked, unmanaged perfectionism.
So step one to solving it is accepting that we’re done trying to get rid of it. It’s part of who we are.
Our new goal is to harness it. To use it.
To embrace it and love it.
We’re basically doing shadow work for the creative process.
Just like trying to suppress or avoid “negative” emotions only gives them power, trying to delete perfectionism only makes it louder.
But underneath this thing is pure energy to create with. To improve with. To leverage as a tool.
To do this, we first need to accept it and stop trying to kick it out.
Give it a seat at the table and welcome it. But make a new contract that states it no longer controls the narrative and it’ll be sharing a room with someone new…it’s opposite.
Do the Opposite
If your creative process is mostly perfectionist, that’s stressful and leads nowhere good in the long run.
The solution is to go in the completely opposite direction.
Give yourself permission and set the intention to create ugly bad low-effort work. Embrace and chase imperfectionism.
This should feel like play.
Like when you were a kid and you did things just because, for fun. For curiosity, not for perfection or metrics or quality.
The antidote to perfectionism is becoming comfortable with imperfectionism, welcoming the mess back into your process.
Cultivate Balance
Once you get comfortable with imperfectionism, it’s time to swing the other way again.
Because too much of anything isn’t good. Both are extremes and we should try to strike a balance.
Sometimes, it’s okay to be a little perfectionist. Other times, it’s good to be a little messy.
When you find yourself being too perfect, turn down the knob and invite some lazy ugly messy action in.
And when you find yourself being a little too loose, crank up the heat a bit and let some of that perfectionist fire drip into the mix.
And try to mix the two so it’s not everything all at once. Aim for a blend, a cocktail.
Over time, you’ll get better at this.
Some days you’ll strike the perfect balance.
Some days, you’ll have no balance at all.
We’re all human, but over time, the bell curve takes shape.
When to Use Switch Gears
So how do you know if you should lean into your perfectionist side or steer the other way?
It’s personal and takes practice. And knowing the signs (from above) helps.
Here’s when I know I’m trying to be too perfect:
I’m stressed
I feel annoyed or frustrated
I’m not having fun, no flow state
I’m over-obsessing on tiny details for too long
I’m not making any progress
I’m hesitating to start out of fear or avoidance
And here’s when I know I might need a little more obsession:
I’m bored
I’m not challenged
I’m not proud of my work or it feels weak and lazy
I feel motivated for deep work, to push myself
This is all a balancing act and something I continue to get better at. But the fact that we no longer need to feel guilty for having perfectionism should feel like a weight off the shoulders.
I definitely feel lighter and I’m getting more done because of it.
Embracing this shadow side of creativity is liberating.
I hope this helps you too.
Alright, until next time ✌️
